Things We Do

For the past year or so, my sister, LL, and I have exchanged pretty regular text messages. It's an easy way for us to communicate since we have pretty different schedules. We use our texts both to actually communicate important information as well as to complain, tell jokes, and basically just keep each other company.

Today, during our conversation, LL began creating presidential emoticons. I thought I'd share them with you all...

:-€

Teddy Roosevelt

(:-0

George W. Bush (doing his eyebrow thing while saying "nucular")

:-;

Bill Clinton (half smile)



Any others, readers? So many presidents, so little time...

Who Said That??

My sister's voicemail service transcribes her messages and emails them to her. I was walking home from a friend's apartment the other day and thought I'd call her to chat for my 10-minute walk. She wasn't there, so I left a quick message wishing her well in her Christmas sewing project and hoping she wasn't feeling too ill, as she has been sick in the past couple of weeks.

This is what it emailed to her. She forwarded it to me. I cannot even figure out what I was saying from it, and I'm the one who left the message:

"Hey, it's me. I was just walking home from Summer I'm looked at 10:00 on Monday but I call and see how you were. But hope you're having a great day and I cannot choose where to go eat and that Jim is going well do not tell probably what you're doing. You're probably sleeping to Jim Grant. Anyway, hope it's going well and I'll talk to you later. I love you. Bye" 

Ho Ho...Huh?

There's a court officer at the building where I work who looks a LOT like Santa Claus. Really, really a lot.

I would not be surprised to find out that he worked as a Santa on the weekends. I would be surprised if he came down my chimney on Christmas Eve, but that's mostly because I don't have a chimney.

The other day, one of the other court officers was being pretty rude to a woman in line to enter the building. This is really out of the ordinary--they're basically a lovely bunch at this building. This guy was CRABBY though.

Then, the Santa Claus officer told the woman not to mind the officer, because he was a "mean, angry bastard."

So, now I'm pretty sure he's not Santa Claus, as I've never heard a Santa say that.

I had to stifle my laughter all the way up to the office, when I promptly burst out laughing and sent a text message to my sister.

I only saw the angry court officer today and not the Santa officer. I was a little disappointed.

But you know, this close to Christmas, it's probably hard for him to be at court...

WHAT??

All I do is write on a blog. It's certainly not professional, and no one pays me for anything I do here. (In fact, no one pays me for anything I do right now. Interesting. I should work on that.)

In any event, as an unpaid, non-professional blogger, I feel totally fine making fun of weird sentences and headlines in the commercial media. I know I'm not perfect, but some of these people need to try a bit harder

Here are some of my favorites I've seen lately:

• Headline: Men who have cancer more likely to die from it (Ed.: uh, yeah, men who have cancer are lots more likely to die from it...than men who don't...pretty sure we're missing something here.)
• A line from an article: Brunch said it's remarkable that Berger survived--at least more than half of people whose hearts stop die.  (Ed.: Really? At least more than half of them??)
• A line from another article: The Disaster Preparedness Commission met biannually some years, but there are gaps in which there is no record of a meeting. (Ed.: Please, google "biannually.")

Is it just me? Has law school made me too critical in my reading? Or do we just have a lot of sloppy professional writing on our hands?

Duty Done

Several of you have asked how jury duty went. Here's the rundown.

I was summoned to New York Supreme Court for jury duty. In New York state, the Supreme Court is the lowest court, or the regular trial court. (Just go with it--I know it's weird, but that's how it works here.)

Basically, I showed up to a hot, crowded room. We were having unseasonably warm weather in the city, and apparently, their heating system couldn't account for that. (That's also something you just have to go with--that happens a lot here as well...New York is weird...) The crowd of us (about 100 in my room, more at other locations) received the same instructions as were on our paper notifications, and then the person in charge proceeded to answer questions regarding that exact same material several times.

Then we waited.

And waited.

They called one jury. How it works is a case is ready for a jury, so they call down and get names. I was called to the civil term, which means my group was only hearing civil cases. In New York, a civil jury is six people, plus two alternate jurors, so they needed eight for each case. They drew 32 names out of a box and sent those people in for voir dire, which is the fancy legal term for jury questioning.

My name wasn't one of them.

And then we never got another case that day. They usually have three cases per day, but that day was light, I guess. Lots of parties settled, I suspect. Eventually, they sent us home.

The next day, I came back. And we waited.

And waited.

And then just before lunch, they decided that they didn't need us for any cases and our jury service was over, and they released us. Since it was just lunchtime, I headed back to chambers to work.

One person fell asleep in one of the rooms where I sat. Well, maybe more than one person, but only one person snored.

Another person listening to his headphones kept humming along. The room was pretty silent, and he didn't seem to realize that none of us could hear the music he heard--we just heard him.

I didn't have cell service, but I did have wifi, so I got a fair amount done, and now I've done my civic duty for SIX YEARS, folks!

Not too shabby.

What Jury Duty is Like

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Sayings

So this old man kept falling asleep on the subway and tipping over onto me during my commute a few days ago. 

I couldn't decide if it was a lucky or unlucky thing. You know, you find a penny, pick it up, and all day long you have good luck? 

There's no rhyme for random old guy sleeping on you in the subway. Anyway, I think someone should make a rhyme about it. Or maybe it's just a sign that everyone on the train was tired. And maybe also a sign that that guy was going to miss his subway stop. 

I've told a few people about it since then. One of my friends from church said maybe it goes, "Old guy falls asleep on you, your day will not be like poo." First: classy. And second: I dunno.

Somebody'sMother said that maybe it should be a song, to the tune of "This Old Man." 

"This old man, drifted off

There's a chance he'll miss his stop."

But then I don't know what the rest of the song would be.

Thoughts on some poetry or songs there, readers? And do you think it's bad luck or good luck to have an old man fall asleep on you on your commute?

Movie Madness

Halloween is a time of great movies on TV. Christmas is, too. And by great, generally, I mean awful. There’s something about holidays that brings out weird, theme movies.

Christmas does have some great, predictable holiday romantic comedies that I love, but for some reason, there are a lot of movies that sound pretty freaky that are holiday-themed "masterpieces."

Case in point: airing around Halloween was “Sleepwalkers.” The description: Mother-and-son monsters who survive on the blood of young women move to a sleepy town in Indiana.

How did that not win an Oscar??

Some Christmas movies, with their descriptions, that I've been seeing looking for nice Christmas movies on Netflix. Uh, these aren't what I'm looking for. (Note: I am not making up or altering any of these. Seriously.)

• Santa Claws: Under normal conditions, a man in a jolly red suit can be delightful. But when the outfit belongs to a demented psycho who's convinced he's Santa Claus, it's absolutely frightful. Raven Quinn, a sexy B-movie scream queen whose marriage is crumbling, is already dreading the Christmas season. When her creepy next-door neighbor starts dishing out his own brand of holiday cheer, things only go south from there.
• Xmas Massacre/Satan Claus/Psycho Santa: Deck the halls with this seasonal trio of gleefully gory Christmas-themed horror flicks. In The Christmas Season Massacre, a bloodthirsty maniac hunts down the high school classmates who antagonized him. In Satan Claus, a couple teams up with a voodoo priestess to try to stop a murderous Santa impersonator who's terrorizing New York City. And in Psycho Santa, a man tells his wife a series of terrifying tales about a not-so-jolly St. Nick.
• Santa Claus Conquers the Martians: The Martians are irked that their children spend so much time watching TV shows from Earth that sing the praises of Santa Claus, so they decide to make a trek to the planet to capture Mr. Claus. During their mission, they also abduct two children who lead the aliens to the North Pole and Santa. The Martians take all three earthlings back to Mars, where, with the help of a native, they manage to spread Christmas cheer throughout the red planet.
• Black Christmas: A bloodthirsty psychopath breaks free from a mental institution and returns to the house where he killed his family on Christmas Eve many years earlier, which happens to now be a sorority house.
• Christmas Evil: The winter weather isn't the only thing that's frightful about this unconventional holiday offering about a toy maker whose obsession with Christmas spirals dangerously out of control. After enduring a traumatic childhood in which he learned there was no such thing as Santa Claus, Harry Stadling takes it upon himself to judge the "naughty" and the "nice." But instead of spreading cheer, he opts for fear.

A quick google search turned up a few other funny ones--here are just the titles:

• Christmas Evil (aka: You'd Better Watch Out)
• Black Christmas
• Santa's Slay (ed: cover art on that one is HILARIOUS)
• Silent Night, Deadly Night
• Jack Frost (catch line: He's Chillin' and Killin')
• Silent Night, Bloody Night

I have no words. Just...no words.

Ah, Youth

I recently met a colleague's daughter. The daughter is about five, and she had heard her mother talk about our group of coworkers for about a year. When I met her today, my colleague told her daughter, Sophie, what my name was.

Sophie was shocked--she did not expect me to be SO YOUNG! Apparently, she expected me to be old like one of our supervising professors, who, for the record, is MAYBE ten years older than I am.

But you know what, I'm feeling pretty good about how young I must look.

Of course, Sophie once thought her own father, in his 30s, was 100 years old, so maybe she's not the best judge of it all.

Still. I'm shockingly young today.

Oh, Netflix

As we've discussed before, I love Netflix. I love everything about it.

I especially love all of the categories that it creates, through some special algorithm, I assume, of things it thinks I'd like to watch. 

Some of my recent favorites that it has created for me:

• Heartfelt Independent Dysfunctional-Family Movies
• Biographical Tortured-Genius Dramas
• Critically Acclaimed Independent Buddy Movies
• Dark Sci-Fi & Fantasy Featuring a Strong Female Lead
• Cerebral Crime Social & Cultural Documentaries

Really makes me wonder what I've been watching...

Duty Calls

I got a jury summons in the mail on the 10th. I happened to be on the phone with Somebody's Mother when I was getting the mail.

Here's a recap of some of our conversation:

Me: Oh no, JURY DUTY! I got a jury summons! Ugh, jury duty!!!
Somebody'sMother: They won't want you anyway.
Me: I know, but I'm going to have to go down there...
Somebody'sMother: It's important to understand how the system works.
Me: I understand how the system works.
Somebody'sMother: At least it will be a bit of variety in your life.
Me: No, it will be EXACTLY like the rest of my life--I spend all day in a courthouse! This will just be a different building.

So yes, jury duty calls.

If you were the lawyers, would you pick me to be on your jury?

We'll see what happens!

My Own Issues

Sometimes, I think a name of a restaurant is particularly proper, funny, weird, or unappetizing.

There's a casual restaurant chain here called "Hot and Crusty."

Gross. 

Recently, the employees of one of the Hot and Crusty restaurant locations wanted to unionize. When they did, the employer shut down the restaurant.

The employees took to the street; they started serving bagels and coffee outside the shuttered restaurant on the sidewalk. That's bagel commitment.

But their union? It's called the Hot and Crusty Workers Association.

Is it just me? I think they could've come up with something better. Anything, really.

Little Yellow Army

I was blessed to go with members of my church to help in the recovery work in the Rockaways, a section of Queens that was really decimated by Superstorm Sandy.

Here's a little video that was made the day I was there: (warning: beautiful, but you may cry)



I'm so grateful for a church that's so well-organized that we could mobilize quickly to give good Christian service to our neighbors in this beautiful city. The devastation here is tremendous; I've been blessed to be pretty unscathed through it all, but some people have literally lost everything.

It was very cool to be out there with the NYPD, FEMA, the Red Cross, the Department of Sanitation, the utility crews, and everyone else who has been working basically 24/7 since the storm. Each time one of their trucks would pass us, or we them, as we worked our way to where our help was needed, I'd raise my hands and cheer for whoever they were, and they would honk and cheer back. It was such a wonderful sense of community and belonging. I'll never forget it.

They were so kind and wonderful to us when we were there helping. Everywhere we went, people were happy to see us (they recognized our yellow vests), and one woman even exclaimed from her porch, "You're angels!"

I didn't feel like an angel. I was covered in mud, and I didn't know how much I had really helped. I came home and took a hot shower, something they cannot do there as they still have no hot water or power. They're cold and exhausted but resilient. I felt like I gained so much more from my time there than they did from my help.

I'll always remember this as the year where I spent the Thanksgiving season learning just how much I have to be grateful for.

Wardrobe Suggestion

New York has lots of grates on the sidewalks. These grates can run for long portions of the sidewalk at places where the subway runs.

When the subway goes past some of them, you get a huge blast of air racing up at you, if you're walking on one of those.

I recommend walking on the solid part of the sidewalk instead of along the grates, as occasionally, one of those grates breaks. Awkward.

But if you're going to walk on the grate, don't wear a short, flippy skirt that might blow up.

But if you do wear a short, flippy skirt that might blow up, please, please wear underwear.

Oy.

You don't ever plan to see a full moon on your way to work, but the other day on my walk to work, I saw someone's full moon several times.

Awkward. But only for me, as she seemed to not notice...

Trainpocalypse

Where I live is very close to the subway line. It's very, very easy for me to hop on the subway and get wherever I need to be. Occasionally, one train will be delayed because of a track condition or police investigation, but I can always take another one.

About twice a year, there's some sort of perfect storm where all of the trains I can take from my neighborhood are completely not running. I like to refer to this as the trainpocalypse, because I am overly dramatic like that.

The problem with trainpocalypse is that it's a ripple effect--since no one in my area can get anywhere on the train, buses are completely full. Huge, huge lines and crowds are at every bus stop, and some buses just drive on past because they cannot squeeze on another person. Catching a cab is also impossible.

During my 1L year, I had to be to school early for an event and that day ended up being a trainpocalypse. I walked about two miles before I found a cab. (Plus side of trainpocalypse, if you don't have to be anywhere in a hurry: you get your exercise in!)

Trainpocalypse happened a few weeks ago day. Fortunately, it wasn't some grisly accident or anything, so I felt totally justified in hating everyone and everything as I tried to get where I was going. After a long walk, a bus, and two trains, I got to work. Not my favorite commute.

On my way home that night, the I could see the indicator that the train was pulling into the station before I was quite there--I was so angry I was going to miss my train! But as I got inside, the train pulled in just as I got there.

I hopped on and thought, "That's right, [delayed line] train! You owed me!!" And then I laughed out loud.

And no one on the train even looked at me, because that's just how we roll here.

**Note: I wrote this post before the hurricane. It's remarkable how much not having the subway for a few days can remind you not to be angry or frustrated by a simple subway delay!

VOTE!!

Election day is next week. I am not allowed to voice any opinions on partisan or non-partisan issues, but I do retain my right to vote, and I certainly will be exercising it. How privileged we are! What a great opportunity!

Be sure to take this weekend to look at a sample ballot and research your candidates. While some elections (such as Presidential) are very prominent this year, you probably have myriad other races in which you need to vote. Check out your city council races, your judicial races (for elected judges), your mayor, your state senate, state congress or assembly, your school council, your county auditor, everything! Those smaller races probably have a much bigger impact on your life than the bigger ones, so don't neglect them.

Be sure to get educated, put it on your calendar, and then get out there and let your voice be heard! No whining about your elected officials if you don't vote. So go ahead and vote, and then we can all whine together.

We Had a Hurricane

Well, we had a hurricane. At least, it started as a hurricane. Later it merged with another storm, and now its official name is "Superstorm Sandy."

I think it sounds like some sort of Pixar character, but, it is what it is.

I haven't had internet access for about a week now (construction related, not storm related) so I haven't had a chance to post. I have some pictures and other thoughts to post, but for now, I just wanted to say how grateful and blessed I am.

There was flooding a few blocks away from my apartment.

But my apartment didn't flood.

Many, many people lost power for many days, and some still don't have power.

But I didn't.

Many people lost heat.

But mine was only lost for a day.

People lost their homes.

But I'm safe and dry.

People lost their loved ones and their lives.

But all of my friends and family are accounted for.

My apartment is in the perfect location for a hurricane. I had no idea that was true--I didn't even think about hurricanes when I moved here.

I am warm, safe, and comfortable.

Today, I had to go to Brooklyn in the early morning for a law school thing. Miraculously, I caught a cab right away--there's a massive gasoline shortage, so cabs are stretched a bit thin. When it was time to come home, the subway service between Brooklyn and Manhattan had finally been restored, and I was able to take a wonderful trip back to my apartment. The whirring electric sound of the subway was so comforting.

I love this beautiful city and am so grateful to be so blessed here.

Clearly Concerned

A few weeks ago, I had a dream that it was late December, and I realized I had not yet listened to any Christmas music. I was totally crushed that I had basically missed the whole Christmas season.

A few nights later, I had another dream that it was late December, and I realized I had not yet listened to any Christmas music. In this dream, I remembered the first dream, and I was so frustrated with myself that the first dream hadn't caused me to listen to Christmas music to enjoy the season.

Clearly, I'm very concerned about missing the Christmas season on a subconscious level. So if you see me listening to Christmas music even though it's not yet Thanksgiving, or if you come over and I have Christmas decorations out, cut me a break--I'm apparently very worried.

Email Etiquette

Seriously--use BCC more. Think about it--if you're sending out information, some people may not want the whole world to know that they're on that information list. BCC. It's the wave of the future.

Also, reply all? Don't reply all unless it pertains to all, or is hilarious and will make me giggle.

Thanks, everyone! Together, we can make the world of email a happier place.

For me.

And really, isn't it all about me?

Pot and Kettle

The other day, I was shopping for tights. I wear black tights almost every day with my suits these days because it can be a bit chilly on my morning walk to work.

I had decided to try to step up my game on the weekends (generally, if I'm not in a suit, I'm in jeans and a hooded sweatshirt), so I went to buy some tights to wear with casual skirts on the weekend. I decided I needed some cream tights to wear with some brown boots.

I got to the store, looked around, saw lots of things, and finally found the tights. There were orange, purple, hot pink, silver, black, and a bunch of other colors. I didn't see any cream, so I asked an employee if they had cream tights. She laughed and said no.

Uh, yeah, it's weird that I want cream tights instead of hot pink???

Alias

Sometimes, working for a judge feels like I'm part of the CIA--I can't talk about it. At all. So thanks for the curiosity, but I really, really can't talk about it. I can't talk about the work we do, I can't talk about the cases we have, and I can't talk about how things run in chambers. So it's a lot like the show Alias, where she works for the CIA, except I don't have an Alias. I just have a job where I can't talk about it.

Sorry.

But one hilarious thing that I CAN talk about is the court officers. In every federal court building, and all of the state courts I know of, you have to go through security to get into the building. The security guards are called court officers, and they do other things besides security screenings, but that's my primary interaction with them.

The court officers at the courthouse where I work are so, so funny. They are always cracking little jokes when I see them in the morning. One day, one of them was scanning my bag, and he says, "Hey! What's with all the guns??" And they all laughed, and I laughed and made some comment about how you can never be too prepared, and off we went.

What a weird job they have. I'm sure glad they're there to brighten the beginning and ending of my days.

What We Have Here is a Failure to Mature

The other day at the store, they were selling a plant called "Bishop's Balls."

When you grow up with four brothers, it doesn't matter how old you get--that's always going to make you laugh.

Feeling Neglected??

LL so kindly noted that it has been a while since I posted anything.

Sorry.

I don't have any good naked New Yorker stories (sorry, LL).

So, it's been a while. How's it going, everyone?

Random story to tide you over until I think of something to post:

Recently, they tore up the concrete of my sidewalk in front of my apartment. One day, they were putting new concrete down at the moment I needed to leave my apartment. Awkward.

So they stretched out a long board, maybe six inches wide, across the wet cement so I could walk out to the solid ground.

I was in a suit.

It was like walking the plank--I kept thinking I was going to fall into the wet cement. Then I would've been late to work.

But strangely, it seemed fitting that if it did happen, maybe there would be a me-shaped divot to mark my time in New York.

I made it.

But maybe in the future, I'll head out in jeans and sneakers with some climbing gear or something--you never can tell.

It's HERE!!!

I was walking through a park, headed to the subway, on Tuesday of this week (September 11, 2012, for the record) and I smelled a smell.

A smell I couldn't place.

A weird, strange, wonderful smell.

After a moment, I realized what the smell was, and I exclaimed (aloud, in a classy fashion)

"IT'S FALL!!!!"

It's official--fall is here, as of Tuesday.

Ah, the smell of fall. No days above 80 degrees in the 10 day forecast. It's going to be 72 on Saturday.

I love the fall.

Kindness Begins with Me

I like to help out the tourists in New York, when I have time. It's pretty easy to pause for a moment when you see a lost person, ask them if they need directions, and then point them to the right subway line or the right street so they can head on their way. Sometimes, if I really have a lot of time, I'll stop when I see one tourist taking pictures of their companion and ask if they'd like me to take a picture of them together.

So the other night, I was walking home from picking up some Panera (mmmm...Panera...), and I saw a couple of women standing by the subway entrance. One was getting into position to pose for a picture by the sign for which station it was, while the other was prepping to take her picture. I thought, "When I get up there, I'll ask if they'd like a picture together." And I smiled as I thought of how adorable they were, so excited by the subway.

Then as I got closer, I saw that the woman posing for the picture was completely topless.

I did not offer to take a picture for them. I walked on by.

On Construction

In this city, something or other is always under construction. These days, there's significant construction in my building (street-level construction), as well as in the underground of a nearby street. (Listen for the blasts--that means things are about to blow up!)

This weekend, things are pretty quiet because of the holiday. Lots of folks are out of the city having one last summertime hurrah, and no one really wants to work.

That's okay. Judging from how the construction looked when I recently left and then returned a month later, it won't matter if they're taking a few days off. Nothing looks like they're making progress anyway...

Pyramid - Round 7

This is a special post that will be easier to guess if you are a regular reader of the blog. (Ooooooo, intriguing...incentive to stay up on the blog, no?)

As always, I'll delay posting the comments for a few days (or a lot of days, if I forget like I did last time) while everyone has a chance to guess.

Ready?

Let's play Pyramid!


Airplanes
Mice, apparently
Lightning bugs

Party Time!

When I was in Utah, I was able to attend the huge, fabulous birthday party for my dad! He's a young spring chicken still, but we thought we'd have a big shindig and invite over family, friends, and coworkers.

What a fun evening we had! The food was great. Attendance was beautiful. Old friends reunited, babies played, and everyone had a fantastic time creating amazing ice cream creations with the soft serve machine we rented.

I would post pictures, but I didn't take any. You'll have to look to other family members for that. (Unless you don't know my family, in which case, just picture the best party you've ever been to. Then double it. It was like that.)

Anyway, it was wonderful to be with my family to celebrate my dad's birthday. I'm so grateful to have him as my dad, and I look forward to many, many more birthdays to come!

This Semester - Fall 2012

Well, it's my last fall semester of my law school career. I can't believe I'm finally a 3L! (That's what third-year students are called.)

This semester, I have the privilege of being a student clerk for a federal judge here in the city. This opportunity takes the place of most of my credits, so I'm barely going to be on campus at all. I'm definitely going to miss seeing my friends, but this is an incredible opportunity for me, and I'm very excited.

As I get going in this adventure, I won't really be able to discuss it much on this blog. The ethical code for judicial clerks is pretty strict about social media, so it's inappropriate for me to discuss any pending cases, any partisan or non-partisan political issues, or any details of my time in the judge's chambers. For the sake of discretion, I also won't be posting the name or district of the judge for whom I'll be working.

I'll try to post a basic sketch about what it's like to work for a judge, but beyond that, I'll have to refrain from discussion.

And what a horrible time to not be able to talk about politics! (I know that I generally don't talk too much about it on this blog, but now that I can't, weirdly, it's all I want to do. Probably some psychology principle there...)

Anyway, I'm incredibly excited and honored to have been selected by my school and the judge for this wonderful program. I'm going to have the opportunity to learn so much. And I won't have any finals!

Last year of law school commencing...here we go!

Re: Cracks

You all did such a great job with the last round of Pyramid--things with cracks!

Bonny made reference to not having personal knowledge of my feet having cracks, so I figured it was worth a post.

My feet have cracks.

The end.

Kidding! When I lived in Utah, I had some blistering and cracking of my hands, which my doctors at the time attributed to the dry winter. In New York, I have blistering and cracking of both my hands and feet, which doctors here have attributed to the humid heat. (Uh, seriously? Come on, folks. Pick a lane...)

Other than being painful and frustrating, it's not terrible. Sometimes it's even exciting, like when I take off a dress shoe and a big piece of my skin stays inside the shoe. Neat! I'm like my own freak show.

I worked hard while visiting my sister and then while visiting my folks to try to get my feet all healed up. I've tried all different kinds of prescription and non-prescription treatments, to varying results.

I really needed to get my feet all taken care of for today.

Why? It's the last day for my Amazon Local deal that I purchased for a manicure & pedicure.

Feet are ready. I am ready. Mani-pedi today, and then I presume my feet will fall into disarray as the winter approaches.

Whatever. At least my toenails will be cute.

Back Home...With Company

For the past few weeks, I've been jetting around the country visiting my family. It was a wonderful break, but I was ready to get back home.

When I got here, I discovered that I had had at least one houseguest while I was gone.

Of the rodent variety.

Somebody's Mother left some dark chocolates in a bag on the top shelf of a hanging set of shelves. (No legs - it just hangs on the wall, several feet up from the floor.)

Someone's been eating it. And leaving tiny wrapper pieces. And poop. All over. Awesome.

How?? HOW?!?!? How did it get up there? There's another thing sort of near by that it might have been able to crawl up, then leap over to...it must've been like a circus in here. Last night, as I laid in bed for my first night at home, I heard something crash down into a trashcan in my kitchen. I have many trashcans in my apartment, but this was the one just below that particular hanging shelf unit.

I took the trash out and didn't look to see if there was a mouse still in it. I just don't need to think about that.

Otherwise, it was a fairly uneventful day. I ended up coming home pretty exhausted from all of my adventures, so I settled into a pattern today of get up, move around a bit, accomplish one thing, take a nap. Repeat.

Tomorrow, I'll have to do a bit more, and classes start, so I'll be headed off to do that. (More on the coming semester in a future post.)

One of these days, I may venture WAY up to Target, to replace my clock, which died some day during my vacation at 10:49. Rest in peace, three-dollar clock.

How I Spent My Summer "Vacation"

Like basically all law students, I spent my summer working. I was fortunate to get a position with Big Firm, and I kept a pretty good life there.

Here's what my usual day looked like:

9:30ish: roll into the office. (Note: NewYorkers, particularly in law firms, don't start the day very early. There are some people at Big Firm who are big morning people and roll in around 7, but they are not the norm. The people who sat near me were never there that early.)
Arrival to about 12:30: Work. What does work involve, you might wonder? On any day, I might be meeting with attorneys, researching law, reading, reading, and reading cases and statutes, writing up memoranda for attorneys, proofing work being submitted to court, accompanying an attorney to one of her court hearings, etc.
12:30 until 1:30 or 2:30 or whenever: Lunch with some attorneys
2:30 until around 7 or so: work some more. New York attorneys may not start their day early, but they also don't end it early. I was usually out of the office around 7 or 7:30, sometimes 8, never past 9:30.

Repeat the next day.

At least once a week, I'd have some kind of meeting or training, and another day during the week, I'd have some kind of social event where I could meet more people at Big Firm. We had a wonderful time.

So there it is--that's what I did this summer. It was a good life, and I'm ready now to head back to school and get more done. First though, I'll probably take a little nap.

Foodie Life

One of the perks of living in NYC is the fabulous, fabulous food. New York is full of delicious restaurants.

One of the drawbacks of being a law student is that I am completely out of money basically all the time. And with my recent tonsillectomy, any extra money I have is already earmarked. Sigh.

Anyway, one cool thing about working at Big Firm, and this is true of pretty much all large law firms, is that when you spend your summer there, they really want you to get to meet lots of different attorneys there, hear all about what they do, and have a chance to work with lots of different people. One way they facilitate this is by having you go to lunch. Of course, the way I go out to lunch in my normal life is maybe picking up some Panera (single-handedly keeping that place in business, perhaps), or something similarly inexpensive. That's not how it works when you go out with attorneys, so I've gotten to eat at some wonderful places. I had delicious salads, beautiful fish, yummy gnocchi, and all kinds of great desserts.

(If you're thinking, wow, that sounds like a great way to gain weight, it can be. I have a friend who gained like 15 pounds in his summer at another law firm...)

This worked so beautifully for me, because after a lovely lunch, I wasn't hungry for dinner, so I usually just had a piece of fruit and went to sleep.

This fall, I'm going to have to go back to my regular life, but it sure was fun to get to go to some of New York's nice places.

Pyramid - Round 6

Well, folks, it's probably time for us to play pyramid again! For the record, on the last round, Springsteen, mothers with new babies, and my assistant are all people who rock!

You know the rules...let's play Pyramid!

Sidewalks
My feet
Plumbers

Have You Looked at a Calendar Lately?

I just got an email today from a company encouraging me to purchase something from them.

The subject line of the email reads: "Start Your Summer Right."

Really, folks? Is August 6th when you start your summer? Because mine is almost over...

Flying By

Well, summer is sure flying by. I finished up my time with Big Firm, and now I'm having a little break before school starts up again. It's crazy to think this is going to be my last year of law school--how did that happen? It seems like yesterday I was floundering about, trying to figure out where to go to school, and now I'm getting ready to complete my last year there.

One part of summer that is NOT flying by is the heat. Oh, the heat. It's so, so very hot. And having to ride the subway around makes it much worse. Subway stations in NYC are usually super heated because of all the heat that comes up off the tracks as the trains move through the system. There are little timers in most stations that tell you how long it is until the next train comes. The summer heat makes me feel sad and distressed even if the train is only two minutes away. So this summer, I've tried to take the buses more, because while they're still air conditioned, I don't have to wait in a super-heated dungeon to get one. I've gotten a bit more familiar with some of the city by riding around in it above ground instead of whipping past below ground.

Of course, when winter comes, I'll be glad I travel by subway.

Now, I get to spend the next year trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my life. Job hunting, life planning, etc. It's exhausting, because I've already done this before. I had a life, and I left it to be a lawyer. And now that I'm almost a lawyer, it's time to get my life a bit more settled again. Hopefully it'll be easy and I can have at least a few settled years before I have to go through this all again.

One of the partners of Big Firm used to have a very successful career in medicine, before he found that too boring and decided he'd rather be a lawyer.

For the record, I'm not going to med school after all of this.

Although that would probably fly by, too.

Identity Crisis

Today I got an email from a customer service person noting they had taken care of my problem and apologizing for the delay in crediting my account for a return. (So far, so good--I did contact them, I did have a problem, and that was what I needed--I felt pretty great about it). Then I realized that the email was addressed to Peggy. Not my name. Not even close. The email is a reply to one of my earlier emails which was appropriately addressed, and it has the right dollar amount for my credit, so I think it's going to happen. But I'm not Peggy.

I also got an email from someone following up on our phone conversation yesterday. (So far, so good--we did have a conversation yesterday.) However, the things he is discussing are not things I asked him about yesterday, and he mentioned other things in the email that are totally inapplicable to me. Awkward...I appreciate the follow up, but it would make a bit more sense if it were about something I had asked him.

It seems like the world is only paying half attention to me. Maybe it's because life at BigFirm is keeping me pretty busy, and I'm only paying half attention to the rest of the world.

Or maybe I didn't notice that someone changed my name to Peggy. Tough to say.

Awkwardly, I should probably respond to the email "following up" on my phone call yesterday...not sure what to say though.

Hot Hot Heat

The weather forecast for today was "steamy." For tonight, it's "muggy."

Gross. It's gross here.

Nothing to Say

Dear Readers,

I seem to have nothing to say.

Really.

Nothing.

I don't want to be a neglectful blogger, but I really can't think of anything to say.

So, here is a question for all of you: what do you want to hear about?

If I don't want to answer, I just won't--so ask away!

Smooches,

Bacon

Weirdness

It's very, very hot in New York right now. New York, especially the city, has a special kind of heat. I swear, the meteorologist on the news last night looked heartbroken and apologetic--it's horrible.

Most of the time, I'm inside. I like to stay inside when possible, which means I haven't been running all of my errands or being very productive on the weekends. Too hot. I have to go down to Macy's this weekend, and it makes me just want to cry--my least favorite place to shop, and it'll be hot and unpleasant to get there and back, too. 

Weirdly, it's extremely chilly in my office building. The other day, I had to turn on a space heater because it was so, so cold in my office.

How is that possible?

Someone wanted to go out for Pinkberry today, but the thought of frozen yogurt just made me shiver.

Any day now, fall will come.

Please, please fall...you can do it!

No Good Metaphor

It's raining rain.

Lots of rain.

From the sky.

In water form.

Sunny.

Then rainy.

Then sunny.

Only sunny when inside.

I bring the rain by stepping outside.

Not enough umbrellas in the world.

What do you think would happen if I went to work in a big garbage bag?

Burns

I think I'm going to start keeping a list of cities in which I have been sunburned.

It will basically be a list of all of the cities I have visited.

I love sunscreen. Love it. Why does this keep happening to me?

New Career

I'm going to open a restaurant. It's going to be called "Chocolate and Toenail." Our cuisine will be all hamburgers, all the time.

LL will be the only customer, but that's really all I need.

PANERA!!!!

Panera opened (after MUCH delay) on Friday.

Today is Monday.

I've been three times.

In my defense, I have not been eating the delicious treats--only the healthy soups and salads.

I probably should cut back though...or perhaps give up my apartment and just move into Panera.

Huh

Now that I'm a 3L, apparently, I'm making the Pyramid game too hard.

Sorry.

I'll try to make the next one a bit easier. (For the record, only LL has gotten it right so far.)

I'm getting too tricky for my own good.

Climate Control

It's very muggy and hot here in the summer. But in stores and buildings, it can be quite cold because of the air conditioning. The other day at the grocery store, it was FREEZING!

As I walked around, I suddenly realized I had hit a warm place.

Weirdly, it was where the fish sat in piles of ice.

Pyramid - Round 5

It's that time again...it's a tricky one this time!

(As last time, I'll wait to post comments for a few days to give everyone a chance to guess).

Let's play Pyramid!

Bruce Springsteen
Mothers of newborns
My assistant

Open Open Open

Today is June 2. I am pretty excited about that.

Why?

On June 6, a Panera is opening in my neighborhood. Right now, the closest Panera to me is in Queens.

QUEENS.

I have been watching them work on my Panera since November of last year.  I walk over to it pretty regularly to see if it's open yet. The other day, they put up a sign that said it's opening June 6.

Come on, Panera, open, open, open!

Love Hate

Big Firm gave me a Blackberry for the summer. I have a love-hate relationship with my Blackberry.

Only without the love.

Apparently, once you use an iPhone, you're completely incapable of using a Blackberry. I consider myself to be a pretty technologically savvy woman, but sheesh, this Blackberry is driving me crazy.

Then again, it does have an awesome light on the front that blinks if I have a message or an appointment to get to or anything.

So I guess I have a little bit of love for my Blackberry. Only a little though.

Weather Wear

Over the weekend, I went out to dinner. It was very warm and muggy, but finally overcast, so I hit the city in shorts and flip flops. I was wandering around, running errands, and then I stopped to have dinner. At dinner, I was reading a book, and once when I looked down for just a moment, I looked back up and realized that it was pouring rain.

But before I left the restaurant, it had stopped, and the sidewalks were drying out. Weird. On my way to the grocery store (one block away from the restaurant) it started to pour again. I ducked into the store, quickly purchased about five items I had come to get, and then headed out. The rain had stopped again.

I have no idea what to wear anymore.

Out of My World

Big Firm has coffee machines on every floor. They tell me that one of the coffee machines on one of the floors is better than the others, but since I don't drink coffee, I couldn't really vouch for that.

I've never really used a coffee machine. When I worked in fast food during and shortly after high school, I used to use a coffee pot and brew coffee that way a few times a week. I never had a traditional internship in college, so I've never had the responsibility to get someone coffee. And although my law school has several coffee machines in the cafe, I've never had the need to use any of them.

After a couple of days at Big Firm, I figured out that the coffee machine on my floor also made hot cocoa. I was pretty excited about this, particularly because my gorgeous office can occasionally be downright chilly. At first, I was just using the coffee machine to get hot water and use cocoa packets, but then I discovered that it makes cocoa all on its own.

On Friday, I found myself wishing that the coffee maker also did marshmallows or whipped cream. Who knows...I may discover that it does. It's pretty fancy.

Summer Adventure

Well, finals are over, and I'm officially a 3L. WOW!!

This summer, I'm working here in NYC for a big law firm. For the sake of privacy, and because it really doesn't matter, I'm not going to put the company's name here. From now on, we'll just call it Big Firm.

I started working at Big Firm this week, and I'm having a great time. My coworkers are all really wonderful. There are around a dozen other law students from around the country working there this summer as well. Big Firm is a really big law firm (hence the name) with offices around the world. Because I'm working at the NY office, I didn't have to move for the summer, and I'm just tickled pink by that.

This week, we had many orientation events, learned some software, ate some great food, got our offices, and started working.

So far, I'm working on some pretty interesting things. Big Firm, by virtue of being a big firm, has some awesome clients all around the world. I can't really talk about who they are, what they do, or what we do for them, but suffice it to say, I get to help attorneys working on matters for celebrities, politicians, and big companies who make or do the things we all use. It's pretty cool.

Big Firm has lots of attorneys who do all kinds of things, some of which you probably didn't know attorneys did. Big Firm has lots of litigators (what you normally think of as attorney work--people suing each other, being prosecuted, pro bono, etc.), as well as transactional attorneys (tax, trusts and estates, finance, mergers and acquisitions, employment, regulatory work, etc.). So as a summer associate, I get to work a little bit with lots of different attorneys doing lots of different things, which is really fun.

Big Firm, like many big firms, is in a big building here in Manhattan, with big, gorgeous offices. After the recruiter took me to my floor, introduced me to my assistant, and left me in my office, I looked around a bit and wondered how I got to be there.

However it happened, it's going to be a great summer.

A Letter

Dear Woman in Front of Me in The ATL Security Line,

You know, as I’ve been here visiting my wonderful sister and her fabulous family, I’ve been struck by how lovely all of the people here in Atlanta are. So warm, so friendly, great customer service everywhere I’ve gone.

You must be from somewhere else.

When you turned around and yelled at me in the security line about how my sniffles were making you sick, I was pretty surprised. I’ve never had a total stranger just yell at me standing in line like that. Although I thought I saw you turning to glare at me a few times before that, I hadn’t made eye contact because I was sure I was mistaken; why would someone glare at a total stranger in line who was just minding her own business?

For the record, I’m just a month into recovery from my tonsillectomy. My soft tissues in my throat and mouth are still recovering. They aren’t done changing shape and size, so I do still struggle with my nose and mouth functions. Also, I’m suffering from terrible allergies or a cold; I’ve been seen by a physician and have had to battle through two weeks of miserable finals feeling entirely ill. On top of it all, I just had to say goodbye to my dear family to head back home. I don’t know if you know what it is to have loved ones, but I miss my wonderful family, and it breaks my heart to not live near my adorable nephews as they grow up. So forgive me if I’m a bit misty on top of it all.

I am not your daughter. I am not your employee. I am not your student. It’s completely inappropriate for you to yell at me. 

I’m glad we’re not on the same flight, because I will continue to cough and be sniffly all the way to New York. Do I want to be? Of course not. Why would I do this if I didn’t have to?

I hope you sit next to a baby on the plane. A baby with a cold. Who cries the whole way. And then barfs on you halfway to your destination.

Actually, I couldn’t wish that on the baby, the poor baby’s mother, or those poor flight attendants who would have to deal with your rudeness. Maybe you should just fly alone. And drive alone. And not go into public until you can learn appropriate societal behaviors.

Best,

Bacon

Friends in All Places

It's so fabulous to have friends in other professions. As a law student, I'm with other law students and lawyers all day. Every day. All the time. All law. All the time. It's very nerdy, so it's good for me to be involved with others.

I have a friend at church who is a dental hygienist. Occasionally she posts interesting things that happen at her office.

The other day, she passed along this gem.

Quoted directly from her post:

Patient-Is that showing plaque affecting the heart?
Hygienist-Yup.
Patient-You would think someone would invent something to prevent that. 
Hygienist-Someone has, it's called floss.

Should Be An App for That...

I have a horrible cough. Horrible, horrible cough that is keeping me up at night and making anyone with whom I interact stare in disgust.

Sorry, folks. I'm pretty sure it's nothing.

Then again, it is pretty gross.

But I'm super busy. I'm actually going to go to the doctor about the cough on my way to school to take a final tomorrow. Yikes. But there's no other time!

I've always been a big fan of internet self diagnosis, but I think that we need to take that up a notch.

New plan: someone make an app where I plug in my symptoms, and then I connect online where I cough into the microphone, and the computer translates it into what's wrong with me.

Is your cough a cold? Pneumonia? Bronchitis? Whooping cough?

There should be an app for that. Million dollar idea, internet friends. One of you should make that. And then let me know when it's done, so I can cough for you.

Maybe there'd be an upgrade you can buy for diagnosing sneezes...

Mother's Day

Today is Mother's Day. Unfortunately, as I am a law student, Mother's Day is at a particularly inopportune time for me each year. After next year, I'll be doing all kinds of fun things for my mother on her day, but for now, a blog post will have to suffice.

I'm probably the luckiest girl in the world to be blessed with my mother. She'll tell you she's not perfect, but she's really perfect for me. This year, she came to stay with me (for ten days!) so that I could have a tonsillectomy but still go to school. Some mornings, she'll call so that we can chat and "go for a walk" together. She even agreed to still love me if I don't get good grades this semester.

I'm grateful today for my mother, and for all the other women in my life who are wonderful examples of womanhood and motherhood.

Found this on someone's Pinterest board. As I do not use Pinterest, I'm not sure how I'm supposed to credit this picture, so I'll just say that I did not take it or make it. I just like it.

Studying/Praying

As a Christian woman, my studying for finals and taking of those exams involves a good mix of studying and prayer.

Lately, lots of prayer.

Less than a week to go!

Construction

Where I live, there is a lot of construction. It's not particular to my part of New York, really, as construction sort of reigns over this city. We all sort of live in harmony with it. Streets get torn up and put back down, scaffolding comes up and goes back down, and we all just go about our business.

I don't usually notice all of the construction equipment, except for occasionally thinking of my dear nephews and how much they'd love it all, but today, I saw something new.

For some reason, parked on the street like any other car, was a giant backhoe. It was unoccupied, with a boom box hanging out the window, blasting "Taking Care of Business."

I can only assume that its owner was nearby, taking care of business. Otherwise, he or she needs to pick a new song.

Studying

Well, it's finals time again. Yippee! Well, not for the finals part, but yippee for the almost-done part!

Unfortunately, I've spent much of this semester sick, and busy, and recovering from my tonsillectomy, so I am feeling pretty behind the game. Hopefully, I'll be able to get lots of studying done this week so that I can be ready to take these suckers and be done.

Once I finish this semester, I'll be 2/3 done with law school. Crazy! But in a wonderful way. And then there's almost no time at all before I start my summer job, learning all kinds of things in a new place. And then, before I know it, it will be fall again, and I'll be back to learning even more new things.

Sheesh, no wonder I'm tired!

People Watching

There is no better place for people watching than in New York City. I just love all of the interesting people you can see as you sit on the subway or sit in a park. Unfortunately, lately, I've been so busy that I haven't gotten to do much of just sitting around and watching people.

Luckily, the people have come to me.

Two winners in the past week or so:

• Man on a bicycle, in a suit, with a helmet, bikes past me, belching as he passes. Nice.
• Normal looking woman walking down the sidewalk, presses a finger to one side of her nose, and proceeds to forcefully blow a booger out of the other side of her nose onto the sidewalk. And the way the light was, I could see it ever so well.

Keeping it classy here in Manhattan.

Allergies

I've been having crazy, horrible allergies lately. Problem here? I have no idea what I'm allergic to. Also, when I sneeze or cough, it hurts my throat because of my tonsillectomy. Yikes.

I've been wracking my brain, trying to figure out what could be my allergy trigger...

• Unfavorable court decisions
• Law school finals
• Law school, generally
• My super clean apartment (really, it's super clean right now--perhaps that's bad for me...interesting)
• My new orchid
• Sleep deprivation

What else do you think it might be, folks?

Pyramid - Round 4

Are we on round 4? That seems right...

Today it's a tricky one--let's play Pyramid!

• Fire
• Orange juice, post-tonsillectomy
• A substantial portion of my cooking

Head to the comments to guess!

Tonsillectomy

Things I've learned from my tonsillectomy (yes, I am recovering from a tonsillectomy right now. It went very well; I had one of the best doctors in Manhattan at one of the finest hospitals around, so everything is fine and dandy)

• You're never too old to let someone take care of you, even/especially if that someone is your mother
• Tonsillectomy post-op care is like a really non-fun drinking game with water and juice. Want to play at home? It goes like this: every time anything happens, take a drink. Wake up? Have a drink. Commercial on TV? Have a drink. Get up to use the restroom? Go ahead and have another drink. Hydration is key, so I feel like all I'm doing is just processing fluids.
• It's a good thing they took my tonsils out, because with how much swelling I have back there now, I wouldn't have any room for them!
• Even foods that seem bland may turn out to be spicy.
• Liquid antibiotics taste EXACTLY the same as when I was a kid and had strep throat all of the time. Too bad no doctors wanted to take out my tonsils then...I was just born in the wrong time, folks.
• Don't tell people depressing things right before surgery - the person who was originally going to be my anesthesiologist, who put in my IV, told me that a tonsillectomy "hurts like hell." Comforting. And she stuck my IV in my right arm, which was annoying. But then she ended up not being my anesthesiologist, and my other anesthesiologist told me that I was going to be fine. The second anesthesiologist ended up being right.
• Doctors act legally cautious even when other people aren't around. I joked with my anesthesiologist that she'd have to make sure I kept breathing, and she said, "I'm going to try." I thought, what an appropriate answer. But if she had promised me that she would, and then I had died, well, no lawsuit there, right? No one else was there to hear it. Maybe it's just a really good habit they're all in.

I'm now about two weeks out of my tonsillectomy. I'm still in some pain, but things are healing well. The saddest part is that my mother went home, so now I just have to take care of myself, which is not nearly as much fun. But I'll survive.

Only a couple of weeks until finals, and then time to start working. Time flies!! (In truth, the days are very, very long, but the school year has really flown.)

Probably time to start learning something about the subjects of my classes...yikes!!!