Hmm...

Some days, I have an inability to speak. Today was one of those days.

For example:

Coworker: What do you want to do after you graduate?
Me: I want to sit on the bum and be a beach.

Not what I meant...just further evidence that my education is actually making me dumber.

Ten

Today, I've been thinking a lot about the number ten and all of its meanings. It's funny, because sometimes ten is good, and others...not so much.

For example:

Ten fingers? Good.

Ten eyes? Bad.

Ten pints of ice cream? Very good.

Ten stalks of celery? Giant waste.

Ten can be used in multipliers, also for good and bad:

Ten times more likely to win the lottery? Good.

Ten times more likely to get salmonella from your crackers? Bad.

Ten times more pints of ice cream? Awesome.

Ten times more obese? Not as awesome.

Ten is also good for looking at comparison percentages:

Top 10% in height? Good, if you want to play basketball.

Top 10% of the most evil shoplifters? Bad.

Top 10% in the senior class of a business school that has the highest accreditation possible in the US? Pretty cool.

Light

Yesterday, I registered for the final semester of my undergraduate career.

Today, I purchased the final textbook of my undergraduate career. The class won't actually start for another six weeks, but I order my books online, and it takes a while to get them. It wasn't a bad purchase though--under $100. (Just barely, but still under.)

On a totally random side note, there is not a book in the world that I would see at the bookstore and think, "OOOO! Only $100!! I'm going to buy that posthaste!" I certainly am not going to miss buying those suckers...

I would rather buy actual suckers - cheaper, and more enjoyable!

But back to the subject at hand: there is a light at the end of the tunnel. People have been telling me this for about a year now, but I believe that those people were looking down a different tunnel than the one through which I have been traveling.

Lately, I've referred to that light at the end of the tunnel as a flashlight. Today, it feels like...a bigger flashlight.

Coordination

I came THIS CLOSE to running into a backhoe today on campus.

I should not text while I walk.

Registration

It's almost time for registration for the summer semester. I got an email from the university that had the dates for summer and fall registration in it.

I put the summer registration date on my calendar, and then I looked at the fall registration date and said,

"Ha ha! Suckers!! I'm not going in the fall!"

Woohoo!!

In truth, one of my classes next semester is supposed to be a giant pain, but it only lasts until 24 June, and then it'll be pretty easy for the rest of the semester, I'd venture to guess.

Quick Facts Update

An update on classes, nine weeks into the semester:
________________________________________
As they'd say on Marketplace, let's do the numbers:

Times I went to the incorrect class: 0
Times I started to go to the incorrect class: 0
Times I have ditched class: 0
Times I have wanted to ditch class: Innumerable
Fellow students in more than one of my classes: Undetermined (Lecture series is HUGE...tough to say...I keep discovering more and more)
Classes with team projects: 2
Classes in which team projects have been clearly explained and are able to be begun: 1
Nightmares about a class which became partially true: 1
Days until graduation: 156
Weeks until I finish my last class of my undergraduate career: 22

Current predictions/awards:
Class in which I feel the dumbest: Right now, none. I'm pretty smart.
Class with the most irritating fellow students: Leadership Process
Class in which I will likely receive the best grade: Executive Lecture Series
Class in which I will likely receive the worst grade: Tough to say...perhaps Contract Law
Class which I dread attending the most: Leadership Process
Class which I dread attending the least: These days, I just dread driving to and sitting in school
Class in which the teacher is most likely to make me cry: No recent crying due to teachers
Class with the professor with the most soothing voice: Organizational Behavior
Class in which I am most likely to get a headache: Contract Law
Class with the worst smokers: Contract Law
Class in which I am the most bored: Leadership Process (those irritating students are also boring--neat combination)
Class in which I am the most hungry: Fundamentals of Mediation and Negotiation
Class most likely to give me nightmares: No recent nightmares, except for one non-school nightmare about getting married...
Class in the scariest part of campus: Fundamentals of Mediation and Negotiation
Class most likely to give me an ulcer: Contract Law
Class in which the teacher has unrealistic expectations of me: Organizational Behavior - I set the initial standards too high, and now I have to maintain or exceed them

Some new awards:
Class in which I feel the most awkward: Fundamentals of Mediation and Negotiation
Class in which I feel the need to nap: All of them
Most inconvenient class: Executive Lecture Series
Class with the hardest tests: Contract Law
Class with the easiest tests: (I'm going to not answer so as to not jinx myself)
Class with the worst homework: Fundamentals of Mediation and Negotiation
Class with the worst projects: Organizational Behavior
Class with the fuzziest instructions: Contract Law
Class with the best team name: Leadership Process - as assigned by the General, "Mongolian Hordes"

Congratulations to the winners. We'll check back on the stats in another few weeks to see how all of the classes are doing.

*Internship is ineligible for any awards related to a specific grade or fellow students, as they are inapplicable to the course.

Things

My sister LL thinks that I haven't been blogging enough. Here is a quick list of random things that I will post for general consideration by the universe. They may not make any sense, but that's what you get on short notice.

• Next week is spring break. This means that I will go to work but then get to go HOME at 6:00 pm and not be at school on Wednesday and Thursday. I could not be more excited.
• In one of my classes, the professor gave an example and in it, I was the leader of a gang, wielding a knife. He cracked himself up making jokes about it all night.
• One of my teachers is a Major General--I sing the song in my head ALL THE TIME.
• My neck is killing me again. I think it's from all the studying. Or the lack of studying.
• I took a test in my Org Behavior class last week and got the exact same grade on the multiple choice section as I did on the first test. I am nothing if not consistent.
• Someone asked me the other day what I'm going to do on my upcoming birthday. I told them that I was going to work for 9 hours and then go to school for 3 hours and then go to sleep. I am a total party animal.
• Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.
• Taco Mart!
• I need a nap so badly. Somebody's Mother and I were watching a Jane Austen movie last night and were up a tad bit late...oops.
• The lecturer for this week's lecture series is someone Marriott. I think I'll enjoy his lecture a lot more if he gives me a pass for a free hotel room or something. None of the lecturers bring prizes for us--they should. It'd be easier to pay attention that way.

And here, for LL's reading enjoyment, is an exchange that just happened between my boss, K, and my coworker, D.

_____________________

K: Are you going to watch the new Star Wars...Star Trek, whatever, movie that has the guy from Heroes who is going to play the leprechaun? (and later...) I know the name of the beamer guy--Steve...Steven...

D: Scotty?

K: Yeah, Scotty. I know their names-Spock is the leprechaun guy.

_____________________

Delightful! I am looking forward to that movie, leprechauns and all.

Disappointments

Last night, I purchased a pint of ice cream for a pity party I was throwing myself. (Long story--don't ask.)

Being virtuous, I only bought one carton, and I bought the low-fat version.

Huge mistake. Not tasty. If I had purchased the nice full-fat version, I'd have something fabulous to turn to tonight for pity party part two. (Again, long story--don't ask.)

I should've bought two cartons. The second carton I decided not to buy was Haagen-Daaz. I knew it would be good, but it was so bad for me...I put it back.

Huge mistake.

Somebody's Birthday

Today is somebody's mother's birthday.

As I was thinking about her birthday last night, I was caught up in all that she does and is, and I was overwhelmed by emotion. It's difficult to describe how wonderful she is. I suppose that most people think that they have the perfect or best mother, but I suspect that there's no cookie-cutter best. I have always felt like somebody's mother was just perfect for me.

Over the past six months or so, somebody's mother has been an invaluable support as I work through my most challenging semesters of school. I have never been so overwhelmed or discouraged by school, but my mother and father have both been there for me throughout it all.

During the past six weeks, our family has had significant challenges, and I am just awed by somebody's mother's ability to handle it all. In addition to all of the things she does, she manages to still be an amazing support and guide for me.

I am blessed with a wonderful relationship with my mother. I feel so lucky to have her. She really is just perfect for me--exactly the mother I need, and a fabulous friend.

So Happy Birthday to somebody's mother. I hope that the next year is easier and sweeter for all of us, but I don't doubt that if we have challenges, you'll certainly handle them with grace and patience...I'll continue to try to figure out how to be more like you in that way. :)

Wanna Play?

Lucky you!

The first FIVE people to respond to this post will get something made by me! My choice. For you.

This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:
1- I make no guarantees that you will like what I make!
2- What I create will be just for you.
3- It'll be done this year. (might be a little while)
4- You have no clue what it's going to be.It may be a story. It may be poetry, shoes, bags, or a little invention of my own! I may draw or paint something. I may bake you something and mail it to you. Who knows? Not you, that's for sure!
5- I reserve the right to do something extremely strange. Believe me... it may blow your mind!

The catch? Oh, the catch is that you must repost this on your blog and offer the same to the first 5 people who do the same on your blog. The first 5 people to do so and leave a comment telling me they did win a FAB-U-LOUS homemade gift by me! Oh, and be sure to post a picture of what you win when you get it!

Sounds like fun, right? So, let's play!

***

Full disclosure: I'm participating in this game because so many of the women in my family are. My super crafty sister-in-law who is probably the most creative person I have ever met started it, and I really want something from her. I was going to just let it pass by since I don't think I can come up with anything for people, but then my sister, and my mom, and my "sister" Shannon, and my cousin, etc. all got involved... What can I say? I caved. I like presents. :)

I make no guarantees about what you will get from me. I also reserve the right to not even work on it until August. (See Graduation Counter if you have any questions...)

Validation

Today in class, someone asked me when I'd be graduating.  When I told them that it would be in August, their eyes got big and they said "Oh! That's so SOON! You must be so excited!"

It was delightful. August doesn't feel soon, but time is really relative, and to lots of the people in my classes, August sounds really soon.

I've decided that I'm going to start telling everyone I meet that I'm graduating in August so that they can be excited for me. Their excitement helps August feel a little bit closer.

I may just get a shirt that says "I'm graduating in August!" in big letters on it.

Not Quite

In my Fundamentals of Mediation and Negotiation class, we spend lots of time doing practice mediations with each other. The disputants have prewritten stories that they read and then interpret, and the third party practices being the mediator.

The practice mediation we were doing on Tuesday was about some cowboys and an issue with a horse not being in a designated pasture.

One of the girls practicing in my group was explaining how she (as the cowboy) was unable to find other horses to keep so that she could pay her bills after the other cowboy removed her horse from the premises (just go with it).

The cowboy/girl then explained:

"There were no other horses that needed to be pasteurized."

Definitely not what she meant. It was all I could do to hold it together and not laugh and disrupt the whole process. Clearly, that was difficult for me, as I am ME, and I have a hard time not laughing. But I kept a straight face. 

Then I ran to tell my parents how funny it was.

On a somewhat related note, although the practice mediation sounds crazy, it was actually one that had happened to our instructor in his practice as a mediator. Who would've thought?

One of the elements of the mediation process is that there is confidentiality, and that the mediator could never be called as a witness if the disputants were unable to resolve the issue in mediation and ended up in court.

So, after our instructor told us that he had actually mediated with these two foul-mouthed cowboys, one of the students asked what the resolution had been. The instructor's answer?

"No idea. I can't remember...that's really why they can't call me as a witness!"

It was funny at the time, but typing it all out, I'm starting to wonder if my humor standard has been lowered by being with less-than-funny people in less-than-funny situations for 13 hours a day and not getting enough sleep.

Apparently, I'm sleep deprived, but not quite to the point of having delirious giggles.

I'll let you know when I get there. 

Victory

I have been attending UVU for almost seven years now. Much of my time is spent in the business building.

For the past seven years, I have been unable to locate the women's restroom in that building. Men would tell me where they thought it would be, but I always explained that that was a men's room with no apparent corresponding women's facility.

During this time, I have been using the staff/faculty women's restroom on the second floor. It has only one stall, and a sign that says that it is not for student use. This fact has not stopped me. I figure that I pay enough to use whatever restroom I please, and have more than once been tempted to even use a men's room when on campus at night.

Tonight, during a break in my Contract Law class, I decided to follow some of the other girls to see if I could find a different restroom. The women I was following/stalking turned out to be headed to some vending machines, and just as I was about to turn around, I saw the lone men's room with no partner. Around the corner from said restroom is the small ROTC hall, usually filled with signs and banners, sometimes actually obstructing the entrance to the hall itself. Tonight, the hallway was clear, and I decided to see if the elusive restroom was located down the hall.

To my great surprise, it's just right there! Not far around the corner at all, in all its glory, I found the mystery room.

However, the facility itself is certainly not the greatest on campus. It was fairly dirty, looking a bit neglected, perhaps from being located so out of the way.

I will probably continue to use the faculty facility, as it is much more conveniently located and well-maintained.

Nevertheless, I found it.

Seven years of college well spent.

Quick Facts

Having no time for a nice, organized post, but possessing the desire to update the universe, I give you some thoughts on the first 4 weeks of school.

As they'd say on Marketplace, let's do the numbers:

Times I went to the incorrect class: 0

Times I started to go to the incorrect class: 0

Times I have ditched class: 0

Times I have wanted to ditch class: Innumerable

Fellow students in more than one of my classes: 1 (Tattooed Man)

Classes with team projects: 2

Classes in which team projects have been clearly explained and are able to be begun: 0

Nightmares about a class which became partially true: 1

Days until graduation: 189

Weeks until I finish my last class of my undergraduate career: 27

Current predictions/awards:

Class in which I feel the dumbest: Contract Law

Class with the most irritating fellow students: Leadership Process

Class in which I will likely receive the best grade: Executive Lecture Series

Class in which I will likely receive the worst grade: Too close to call - Leadership Process or Contract Law

Class which I dread attending the most: Fundamentals of Mediation and Negotiation (good class--too long)

Class which I dread attending the least: Organizational Behavior

Class in which the teacher is most likely to make me cry: Contract Law

Class with the professor with the most soothing voice: Organizational Behavior

Class in which I am most likely to get a headache: Contract Law

Class with the worst smokers: Contract Law

Class in which I am the most bored: Leadership Process (those irritating students are also boring--neat combination)

Class in which I am the most hungry: Fundamentals of Mediation and Negotiation

Class most likely to give me nightmares: Contract Law

Class in the scariest part of campus: Fundamentals of Mediation and Negotiation

Class most likely to give me an ulcer: Contract Law

Class in which the teacher has unrealistic expectations of me: (tie) Contract Law, Leadership Process

Congratulations to the winners. We'll check back on the stats in another few weeks to see how all of the classes are doing.

*Internship is ineligible for any awards related to a specific grade or fellow students, as they are inapplicable to the course.

Checking In

Things are busy.

I am busy.

Leisure time is scarce.

Brain power is minimal.

Humor is non-existent.

Irony is lost on me.

Nap time is elusive.

Give me seven months.

I'll be back.

Semester Predictions

I have been quite busy lately between work, school, and a quick trip to California with my sweet nephews. In all of the hustle, I neglected to compile some semester predictions.

As I embark on my penultimate semester, I have mixed feelings. Many students have mixed feelings as they near graduation. They are nervous for the future, sad to be leaving friends, excited for what is to come, worried about getting a job, etc.

My mixed feelings are very different. My feelings are a mixture of being happy about school being over and frustration that it's not over yet. That's all. I will not miss school. There are people who say that I just don't understand, that once I'm out in the professional world, I'll look back on my days in college and miss them.

Those people are incorrect. I am already in the professional world, having worked at my job for just over six years now. I'm ready for work to be the only thing I have to worry about for a while. Those people, incidentally, are the same who told me that I'd look back on high school and wish I could do it again. They were very wrong about that as well.

Over the last couple of weeks, I took a poll about what you all thought would happen this semester.  The results:

Number of times Liz will walk to/into the wrong class:

Zero: 3 blog readers

1-3: 3 blog readers

7: 2 blog readers (who are you people? Do you think I'm that spatially/chronologically inept?)

Class that will be Liz's favorite:

Organizational Behavior: 1 blog reader

Fundamentals of Mediation and Negotiation: 2 blog readers

Contract Law: 2 blog readers

Leadership Process: 0 blog readers (do you people think that I have no leadership potential? Because I definitely do. There is always a BIG line of followers behind me at Coldstone.)

Executive Lecture Series: 0 blog readers (you are correct--this is not my favorite class)

Internship: 3 blog readers (These readers must know the secret--this class is me getting credit for work, which I would already be going to anyway)

I will probably fill in the details on what is happening in all of my classes, but here are the early results, in case any of you had money riding on it.

After two and a half weeks of classes, I am really enjoying my Organizational Behavior class. I really like the teacher, find the subject matter to be interesting, and that class ends at 8:00 pm, so I get home at a decent time. The internship has actually been a bit of a pain so far, in that there is a lot of paperwork and such required up front, but hopefully that will settle down and become simple and wonderful. The Executive Lecture Series is a giant logistical pain, but other than that will be fine.

I'll try to fill in the details on all of the classes over the next few weeks, but I make no guarantees. I'm busy.

And for anyone who is counting, I have gone to the wrong class (or started to go to the wrong class) exactly zero times so far. I use iCal to tell me when and where my classes are, so a little alert pops up on my iPhone with the name and location of the class. Without my iPhone, it would be more complicated...just another way that the iPhone has changed my life. Judge me all you want--I end up in the right places at the right times, and that's a beautiful thing.

In that same nerdy vein, I moved the "Graduation Countdown" to the top center of the blog so that everyone can see it every day and start getting excited.

That's your job, people. Start getting excited. You don't have a lot of jobs here, but that will be your job for the next 201 days. Don't let me down.

Into the Ocean

Tonight, we had dinner at a seafood restaurant right by the ocean. As we waited for our check to come (not a speedy process at that place), I took my younger nephew, J, to look at the boats parked at the dock while we waited.

When we got there, a small portion of the water was illuminated at the rear of a boat. At first, I thought that the ocean was full of trash, but as we looked closer, J and I decided that it was actually a flock of jellyfish. (Flock? Gaggle? Herd? I don't know. I could Google it, but then how would you learn how to find answers for yourselves?)

The pictures are just from my phone, so they're a bit blurry, but it was amazing! I've never seen jellyfish not in a movie, and certainly not in the ocean.



(The jellyfish are in the top-left corner of the water).



There were some jellyfish closer to us, but that was where the lighting was the best to capture them. We hurried to tell the others to come and look, and then we watched the jellyfish swoosh around the water until they moved, as a group, into the darker waters.

I told J that it was the first time I had seen jellyfish. He told me it was his first time, too. I told him I was glad that we were seeing them for the first time together. He then proceeded to explain that the more opaque part of each jellyfish was where it had a baby jellyfish inside of it. I told him that I wasn't sure that that was how it worked, and he assured me that it was. As he recently studied the ocean in preschool and made a paper jellyfish, I suppose he is the expert.

So, if you're wondering what jellyfish look like, they look like trash.

Many things that look like trash are actually pretty amazing, if you take a closer look.

Clarity

Last night, my brother and I stood in front of this sign, completely baffled as to where my hotel room was.

My room number: 3430.

Which way is my room?

And, frankly, which way are any of the rooms?

The more you look at the sign, the less clarity you'll find, unless you are the maker of the sign and can explain it...

Fortunately, we were with children, and sent them racing down the hall to find the room, which they were able to do very quickly.

I guess that the answer to a problem like this is to ignore the signs and just start running.

More Fun Kids

J: My nightmares are about gorillas.
T: And tacos.

(Not sure if the gorillas and tacos are the same dream or not, but
either way, a nightmare about tacos has got to be pretty scary.)

Me: (dancing around to the music on the car) When we get to
Disneyland, should I dance?
J: No. Let's ride the rides.

Ive been laughing so hard ever since we started our vacation. How
lucky am I?? Headed to the happiest place on earth with two of the
greatest boys on earth. I've got it made.

Kids

I'm currently on vacation with my nephews J (age 5) and T (age 8) and
their parents. They just had a cute conversation.

T: How old is Steven?
Me: He's 20.
J: If you were 145, you would die.
Me: Um, yep, you're probably right.
J: But if you were 0, you'd be okay.
T: 95 is probably pretty good.

Too cute.