This week, I've been standing relatively still, watching the world swirl about me. Then again, maybe I'm just swirling around in the world. In any case, it has been unusual. The past few weeks, I haven't been in control of what is happening in my world, and that's always frustrating. I'm used to dealing with my own issues--I'm pretty tough, and I've been through a lot in my life, so when I struggle, I know how to deal with that. It's not a pretty picture, but it's doable. I find that most things in life are doable, if for no other reason than that you don't have a choice but to do them, but that's a topic for another time.
This past few weeks, I've been dealing with another kind of issue in addition to my own: the issues of those who matter to me. I am pretty involved in the lives of many people who work for the company where I work, and in the past little bit several of them have been tragically impacted, and I can't fix it. What do you tell someone who has experienced a traumatic event? How do you handle a situation where people are called into active duty in the military, living through some of the most dangerous situations on the planet. What can you say to the 23 year old widow? Unable to change the world, I do my best to simply support others. Then at the end of the day, I come home emotionally exhausted, remembering the burdens of others as well as my own.
So for now, I swirl. I float through life, waiting for my feet to land back on the ground. I hope that I find my footing soon.
24 March 2007
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